In hiding

missingiris @ 2008-07-06T15:30:00

2008-07-06T21:38:16Z

I wasted my entire weekend on the computer playing Civilizations. 1.2. the sid meyers 1993 version. I would have prefered the 1992 version, but it's good enough. i took over the world yesterday.

not working is nice.

i'm taking off in a few days, i'll be back at the end of the month.

the summer is going by like its barely even happening. I was thinking of snagging me a cowboy this week, but i don't have the energy to be bothered. i haven't even had one stampede breakfast yet. Shit, it's 3:30 and I haven't even put on any clothes today.

that is how i waste summers.

i sit around all the other months of the year thinking 'when summer comes i'm gonna...' and then it does and i don't. what a load of crap.

also, my hair is too warm. i think i might cut it so so short. like a cm short. maybe i'll really get a chelsea, just so everyone can be like 'ha ha, your name is chelsea and you got a chelsea'. fuck people. and summer.

missingiris @ 2008-06-30T14:28:00

2008-06-30T20:29:32Z

so i just stuck a jasmine green tea bag into my can of ginger ale, and now i have my own carbonated green tea beverage. in a green can. and i'm wearing a green shirt today. this is because i love the environment.

missingiris @ 2008-06-27T12:31:00

2008-06-27T18:32:04Z

I'm really curious what people think about this video, if you're willing to watch it through once...critically and honestly.

missingiris @ 2008-06-23T12:15:00

2008-06-23T18:39:21Z

ok. no more beer. i made myself steak last night, and there was one tubby of red flag left in the fridge and i drank it with my meal.

now i propose to go 10 days without beer. i think this will be more challenging and healthy than 10 consecutive beer drinking days. also...10 days? no beer? that's not going to happen.

it's back to a normal old work week. nobody said anything to me this morning about not showing up on thursday. phewph.

also, i love sunterra so much i want to marry it.

one other thing i just remembered. a couple of nights ago, when i was stoned, i fell asleep to some comsic premonition that my purpose in life is to write books. for a living. which sounds sweet and all, but stoned premonitions usually turn out to be complete bullshit. and what the shit am i going to write about?

missingiris @ 2008-06-21T16:00:00

2008-06-21T22:08:53Z

One day you're sitting around in the rain, and it's supposed to be summer, but its raining outside and everyone is grumbling at what a horrible summer it is so far.

and then one day, it's sunny, and pretty, and everyone rushes out to do something. And the next day its sunny again, and everyone thinks they're blessed with good luck , so they run out there and take advantage of the day again.

And then you realize it's been a week straight of days like these.

And then it becomes a little chaotic. it's like a week long party. You realize you've been drinking for 8 days solid. You don't remember what you did the day before yesterday. But there's smatterings of thoughts and places that don't seem to mesh. Jumping on a trampoline, high as a kite, dressed in a godzilla suit, barefoot and hula hooping. Theme songs of Michael Jackson, Regina Spektor, David Bowie, Daft Punk. Trying to dig up a queen ant, and discovering just how protective an ancient nation of ants can be, and how clever they are to keep their queen tucked safe and snug deep beneath a sidewalk. Finding a bottle of blueberry vodka on the back of a toilet in a shady bar, and taking it home to drink it on the train with a friend, being told by the train security that we ought not be drinking it on the train, and then walking by like he saw nothing. wondering honestly if i had been native, or a teenager, or an old man, would we have recieved that same little slap on the wrist? And preening in a mirror, straightening my hair, delighting in my new shorter locks, shaking the weight of it on warmer days to let the cool air in, tugging at it, getting my fingers wrapped in them, not particularly needing to comb it anymore, and the way it takes up no space in the shower. Discovering a lusty desire to play the drums, watching bands and finding myself so absorbed in the drummer's every hypnotic move, the pace, the sound, the freedom of energy and the constriction of time. Letting Sukie off her leash for a minute, thinking she wouldn't stray while i distracted myself for a minute, and the sinking feeling when i realized i didn't know where she was when she quietly disappeared, and how unbearable it would be if i never saw her again. cooking birthday breakfast for sadie, naturally evolving into breakfast for sadie, derek, julian, J.T. and myself, cooking all that bacon on a cookie sheet in the oven. doing dishes with julian, organizing recycling at someone else's house. Watching derek, paul, and julian race around the block 3 times, and scrambling with the others on the last round to form obtacles of alleyway junk, mattresses and garbage cans, waving the FNB flag as the winner crosses the mattress line. Wandering alone down the street, singing to myself, experimenting with the sound of my voice, wishing i could just throw away my life and job, to sit down and record it all through lyrics and airy passion. all those godamn mosquitoes, they still itch. Reading the journal of an old lover who barely deserves the time he's still receiving in my mind, furious that he keeps finding his way back in. Sitting in riley park in the middle of the day, alone, drinking cherry beer, and watching the clusters of underage punk kids 'secretly' drinking under the shade of trees. Watching that girl starting shit, trying to punch that boy in the face until he tried to punch back, and the swarm of boys and girls alike coming to her 'rescue', calling the boy out, yelling at him, telling him he was in the wrong, and to get the fuck out of the park. thinking 'why doesn't he tell them the truth?' And all the new stores and eateries and the 4 or five bars. tasting his cake and cream icecream, wishing i'd got that flavour, trying to get through my chewy peppermint icecream, the cold in my mouth reminding me of where all those cavities are. The guilt clouding around your head as you remind yourself that you tried to seduce those you shouldn't have. The clicking sound of a clumsy squirrel falling off the roof and scrambling over the edge of an eavesdrop, just to jump back up again and return to being a squirrel, gracefully bounding and flying along a highway in the air. And then down to the ground, his entire body poised motionless, and then his tail twitching and his front legs digging at the soil with amazing dexterity. And then there was poetry somewhere too, and an old man named Jim, telling me that poetry is simple, all you have to do is prove to yourself you exist. Just as you'd prove to a friend that another friend of yours existed once, as you share a story with them of people, places and times they never took part in. And then there's hearing those stories, sitting around a patio table, or on couches in an apartment you've never seen since, or standing off to the side passing the joint. You hear stories about people and friends, and you imagine them, and every now and then they come back to you with the force of memories, but you were never there. And then you're lying in bed thinking of a story your mother told you about when she was 14, and you're reminded of it every time you see her order a brown cow, despite what it resulted in, and you try to remember what it felt like to be 14, and it was so long ago, that all you remember are stories and an overall sense of naivety. and you think if you went back to your old self and told her how things are now, the younger you wouldn't believe what you told her, or what you looked like, she wouldn't be able to comprehend. You think of how your friend just turned 24, and you're only a year away. there's been so many chaotic weeks in those ten years, like this one. And if every one of those weeks were an ant, and the last ten years were that colony, its no wonder i'm a festering mess of little bodies spreading out to invoke feelings of restlessness, and to viciously bite whatever flesh comes across my path. And then out of nowhere, it seems, your enjoyment just passes like a cloud, and you lose your mind again, and you curl up in someone else's bed and its all so empty and you wish you only knew why you are crying. and if i had a choice of whether i would spend my life in a crumpled heap of broken matter, or recklessly drinking and lending my body to the summer nights, i know which i'd choose, yet its so seemingly out of my control. And you fall asleep, but your mind is still in tangles, and the dreams are less than comforting. And when you wake up, its too difficult to pull yourself out of bed to go to work, so you just don't, for the third time this month, you just don't go to work, because its really not in your best interest, your life is, and your crumbling sanity, and you couldn't give a shit about what your job has to say about it, or about any damn oil company or temp company. and you can't be bothered to think up a good reason, so you just don't call in. And when your mind isn't caught up in the world outside, you're in your calmer thoughts, and there's a lover in there too, a lover who actually deserves to be in there. and even when you kick his car, or bite, or start a fight, or keep him awake, or eat his food, or give him a bad haircut, or take his money, or let him in on a bitter confusing truth, or pull your bossy mean shit on him, he's still out there watching clouds with you, and running with your rabbit across a field, and digging up anthills, and voluntarily giving into all your demands and whims. cause he loves you anyway. and all the pretty things too, the way that cat sits there and blinks at you, with her little green eyes reflecting the sky. because she loves you too. and those little pansies in a sweet little shot glass bouquet. and my feet slightly burning as they rest on the roof shingles. and playing grounders in the park into the middle of the night, when adults can take back their playgrounds rights. and looking out any front window in the upstairs living room in Calgary, and the glowing green canopy of leaves and branches let free, occupying the same space as the sky, and making a hideout for the bumblebees, all the glowing light falling on curtains and chairs, and making the room feel like the most gentle and welcome place you've ever been. the taste of grass. and ice tea. and how much softer pillows are when they are shared. and looking around at all your friends, and noting to yourself that every single one of them is exceptionally beautiful and attractive to look at, and you know it's because who they are is perfect, and you wouldn't want them to be anything other than who they are. and you're so happy they encompass your life too, and you just want to sit there blinking at them in adoration the way that cat of yours blinks at you. and you love them all, and all the places you wander off to to get away from them, and end up bumping into them. and you end up babbling like a nutjob all over your livejournal, and then you have the nerve to think yourself restless, and you dare to feel yourself so detached, or to cry over the emptiness, or to think it isn't enough. and there are times you actually believe you're not living life to its fullest.

missingiris @ 2008-06-18T12:31:00

2008-06-18T18:50:44Z

man, i actually have to do my job now. i thought i was done all the arctic maps, but there was this whole other mislabeled box of at least 100, and i have to get them finished between today and tomorrow (i don't work friday, i get a day off!), because i think the week after that is my last week, and i have other boxes to finish.

on a totally unrelated note, i was just exploring the face of the earth on googlemaps, and China is scary. I mean, the cities there are HUGE and congested and i wouldn't want to live there. shanghai is about the size of 6 calgarys. also, why are most of roofs in asia either orange or bright blue?

missingiris @ 2008-06-18T10:03:00

2008-06-18T16:28:36Z

It's not that i'm shocked or anything, and it's not like i'm not known to like my booze, but yesterday was the fifth consecutive day i drank beer. And not just a little beer. I mean like, a few bottles or pints or whatever. I kind of want to keep it going to last at least a week, or perhaps right on into the next weekend. i'd play a little game to see how long i could go drinking daily...but that would be kind of a dumb thing to do to myself. my guts would have a fit. my liver would not allow it.

I've been very late for work lately. like, everyday. by at least half an hour. and nobody says anything. then when i get to work, i dick around on the computer pretty much all day, and i only do work when someone walks by.

summer is pretty much here now, so i'm really in the mood to go out and stay out as often as i can. if anyone wants to do something, they should call me, 7106400.

also, it better be before tomorrow, cause we're all going to die tomorrow, for reals, because of that dark matter string theory experiment thing going on in europe. i'd link the article, but i can't actually find the article, it's been all word of mouth and everyone is all like 'oh, it's real' but nobody really knows that much about it. and besides, it wasn't on the news or in metro or anything. so it can't be real.

missingiris @ 2008-06-09T11:53:00

2008-06-09T18:24:56Z

So last night i woke up and i see the door is wide open to the living room and i'm like...what the hell? because i always close that door to keep the hedgehog in, and so i get up (and i'm not wearing anything at all) and i go to close the door. then i wake up a couple hours later, and same thing. and i'm kinda pissed off, because this means i'm going to have to get up early to go on a hedgehog hunt before work to make sure that the hedgehog is in my room. then another hour later i wake up to the sound of someone snoring...and i'm like, there's no way that's my roomate. and then i realize someone is sleeping on the couch outside my room, and i'm all like...oh, ok, whatever. but then this morning, it's all dark in my room and i wake up to the figure of some unidentified man in my room being all like 'hey, where am i?' and i'm like 'um, you're in my room...' and he's like 'can i lie down here?' and he starts to get on my bed and i'm like 'um, NO, no you can't...who are you?' and he gets all startled and he's like 'you're not the girl i came home with last night? you didn't drive me here in a white car? oh, i'm so sorry.' and then he leaves.

ok...sketchy much? i think i need a house meeting. but...honestly i'm more like 'wait, we can't have random sketchy drunk one night stands sleeping in the living room! what if he'd stepped on my hedgehog?' i'm more concerned about her safety than my comfort.

anyway. my freaking job is ridiculous. there isn't any work for me to do today, so they gave me this other stuff to do that doesn't really need to be done, which i'm doing slowly, because they really only gave it to me because they didn't know what to give me to do, and i think they expected me to go around the corner and plunk away at the internet anyway.

i chopped off my hair yesterday. i leaned back in the downstairs bathtub at punksylvainia, gathered all my hair behind my head and chopped it off with a pair of purple papermate safety scissors. it's kind of like a messy bob. i like it.

yep. that's about it. my life isn't very exciting at all lately. i spend so much time by myself not talking to anyone at work that i get used to being alone in my head, and i forget to socialize. getting rather lonesome.

i've started drumming lately. paul has drums in the garage. i would like to learn how to actually BE a drummer, other than looking at youtube videos. i listen to oldies rock on the radio all the time, i'm trying to pay attention to the drumming, but i'm just not a natural at noticing stuff like that. i really want to learn though.

the ant farm is still a work in progress. the weather has sucked here lately. the encasement is finished, i just need a sunny day to dig up those buggers.

missingiris @ 2008-06-03T13:02:00

2008-06-03T19:08:25Z

Derek and I are building an ant farm. we're going to be done in a week or so, i hope, and then everyone should come over and see it because it's going to be the best ant farm ever. and you guys can all help me name the ants and write speech bubbles and other ant related stuff all over the glass.

also, does anyone have any spare magnifying glasses lying around that they don't use that they could maybe relocate/lend to me to be put to a good use? (or know a good place to buy them?)

also, i need to buy agar in a powder form to make ant food...does anyone know where a person can buy agar?

missingiris @ 2008-05-12T18:56:00

2008-05-13T01:00:32Z

Hey hon! You know what else is a really great online comic?

the one where the boyfriend GETS A JOB.

missingiris @ 2008-05-09T16:21:00

2008-05-09T22:23:59Z

come to think of it....that was one hell of a long week.

THE CONTENTS OF CHELSEA'S PURSE

2008-04-15T01:35:17Z

1. 1 empty plastic safeway bag
2. 'Pride and Prejudice" by Jane Austin
3. a squished up toilet paper roll
4. A snot rag
5. my slingshot
6. Ginseng Herbal Cigarettes from Vancouver, 1/2 left
7. receipt x22
8. 2008 Calgary Hitmen Playoffs ticket stub
9. 'Stardust' novel, Neil Gaiman
10. NYC cheap eyeshadow, colours black, light blue, gold, purply grey
11. cell phone car charger
12. tylenol, 1 left
13. great lash mascara, the pink and green kind, unfortunately in brown instead of black because i forgot to look when i bought it.
14. Bitch mints, in a little tin
15. a Tiki-Ming Napkin, once used on my nose
16. A halls neacklace (the cord from a brocken necklace which happened to have a halls stuck to it when i took it out)
17. unopened safeway 'life on the go' card (please try again)
18. Empty halls wrappers x9
19. Empty halls packaging
19. post it note with a red pen hand drawn map on it, with stars indicating punks, new jerusalem, and my house (for biking)
19. a receipt with my mom's visa and MC numbers written on it.....sweet....
20. a loose note with my mom's phone numbers on it (home, cell, work)
21. 2 unwrapped halls
22. two bobby pins
23. Pride Festival 2008 info promo card
24. eyeliner
25. paper clip
26. Vancouver transit pass
27. hair elastic
28. Envelope that reads "Chelsea Hebert, c/o Punksylvania"
29. post it notes containing rabbit medical information
30. a very old and dirty white eraser
31. strip of cardboard from a pack of strawberry pocky
32. 3 Keys (i have house keys...?) on a key ring with a petcetera discount card
33. USB thumb drive (given to me by derek who it was given to by Sadie)
34. a tin of Diva Mints
35. Wet n Wild megaslicks lip gloss (so slick...and wet)
36. papermate blue pen
37. cell phone
38. loose key...to something...?
39. More post it notes for names/places/times/directions/vet phone numbers for Charlie
40. Alberta ID
41. Canadian Tire Master Card
42. Scotia Bank Debit Card
43. a single gravol in its wrapper
44. ball of plastic...wrapper...?
45. hand drawn map of Tofield, Alberta
46. National Geographic, headlining 'poison', stolen from the coffee shop i go to
49. a dimebag of Rainbow Rooibois
50. a dimebag of imps herbal tea
51. Onstream Paystub
52. empty Diversified temping timesheets (one filled out too)
53. my T4 from the job i worked at that had a website and sold flowers that shows up first thing if you put florist in google, but that i'm not allowed to say i worked at in my blog.
54. my tax return from last year
55. 67 cents in change
56. )in the side pocket) 2 empty rolled up subway bags, 3 rechargable AA batteries, 2 rechargeable AAA batteries, spare nails i found on the ground in alleys downtown that i can use in my apartment rather than going to the store to buy new ones.

(now for the putting it all back in the purse)

(also, for all my friends with puses full of junk, feel free to treat this like one of those surveys and tell me all about the crap in your purse, or whatever you own that most closely resembles a purse)

missingiris @ 2008-04-14T13:51:00

2008-04-14T19:52:31Z

oh noes. i just lost THE GAME. and i'm taking you all down with me.

missingiris @ 2008-04-10T16:53:00

2008-04-10T22:53:27Z

excerpt from some online article:

"A student named David Merrill devised an experiment to discover how music would affect the ability of mice to learn new things. Merrill had one group of mice listen to classical music 24 hours a day and another to heavy metal music. He then timed the mice as they ran through mazes to see if the music affected their speed of learning. Unfortunately, he had to cut the first experiment short because the heavy metal mice all killed one another."

missingiris @ 2008-04-10T10:06:00

2008-04-10T16:07:27Z

The bunny made it. He's going to be just fine.

missingiris @ 2008-03-28T15:25:00

2008-03-28T21:28:55Z

so...

i just got 2 free tickets to the Calgary Hitmen Playoffs for tonight...at the saddledome.

does anyone want to go with me?

or does anyone know anyone who would actually enjoy these who i can give them to? i have a parking pass. you can park your bikes in the parking spot.

missingiris @ 2008-03-26T14:56:00

2008-03-26T20:57:07Z

My bunny has a $1400 injury. i'm still not quite over the shock. Where the hell does a person get $1400?

missingiris @ 2008-03-25T13:11:00

2008-03-25T19:18:13Z

Freaking bunny. He jumped out of my arms last night while Derek and I were out walking and he hurt himself pretty bad. I was really sure he'd broken his back leg, but i left work today to go get him checked out and x-rayed and he's popped his hip out of joint. and because he's a rabbit, it can't just be popped back into place, he actually needs some costly surgery to pin it in place or remove the end of his femur so that his bone can heal back in place. This is all going to be way up there in the upper hundreds. I'm already at like...$250. I'm patiently waiting to find out the if / how much for surgery.

This or he's going to be a 3 legged cripple bun for the rest of his life.

Damn it, bunny.

I brought him to work with me after the vets, he's here with me. He's not really in much pain, he seems his normal self, he just has difficulty running and can't use his leg at all.

Poor Charsley.

missingiris @ 2008-03-24T12:42:00

2008-03-24T18:59:35Z

- I have about 20 minutes left to my lunch.
-I got back from my trip to Vancouver late Saturday, it was nice, kind of busy. less of a vacation and more of a trip with a purpose. It was a nice visit though and a nice break.
-thanks to Derek insisting on filling the tank every half/quarter used, and the gas stations taking a pre authorized $100 every time, my card is maxed until they give be back my money. i think. no bus pass for me.
-i have tons of organizing and unpacking to do. it's like i've accoplished nothing. I am honestly sick to death of it. It doesn't end.
-i forgot it was easter yesterday.
-my pets are back, charlie has tranformed into a nice friendly rabbit who doesn't bite or growl and doesn't mind if you pick him up. freaking bonus. Sukie and Chars have adjusted, and now its the hedgehog's turn to adjust, and she's not impressed.
-I'm in the middle of reading Pride and Prejudice. I like it.
-Derek and I are still reading The Amber Spyglass.
-I bought a book about I Ching, tried it twice yesteday, and i've decided it sucks and i'm sticking to science.
-i have a cell phone now. 710-6400.
-i'm not so happy to be back at my job.
-I need hobbies.
-i want to go out and do stuff.

I NEED A PET CAGE, HELP ME, WILL TRADE OR PAY

2008-01-15T05:05:21Z

Has anyone out there who i know who lives in calgary who reads this got a spare pet cage lying around that you aren't using that i can have? like a rabbit/guinea-pig cage? i need an indoor pet cage, doesn't have to be all that big, about 2 or three square feet is good, it needs to be bigger than a hamster cage, and preferably the kind with the plastic bottom and the metal wire top, but that isn't necessary really either, because the new pet i'm getting for my birthday isn't going to chew through anything and it isn't very big so it doesn't need very much space, but it would probably be happier if it had bedding, so the bottom should be solid and enclosed (not mesh or grates, she has very tiny feet and she might hurt herself). A spare aquarium would do also, i could even use a cracked aquarium, because the type of pet i'm getting doesn't swim...i don't think...well, mine won't be swimming even if they do.

ps, i am not getting a house hippo.

missingiris @ 2007-12-05T12:27:00

2007-12-05T19:45:07Z

I NEED A PLACE TO LIVE

So yeah. I need a place to live that is pet friendly as of january 1st. In calgary. And currently i'm really broke and i don't have a job and i have to go back to bc for christmas and to get my pets and bring them back here and i don't know how i'm going to afford that either or where my pets will live if i can't find a place., i'm a little bit stuck at the moment but i'm pretty sure things will get sorted out.. Does anyone within the community know anyone who wants a roomate or a place to stay? I'm looking at maybe a house in Marda Loop, or anywhere really, i'm not going to be too fussy at this point, i'm sort of desperate, but it has to be a pet friendly situation, but no other cats because my cat can't live with other cats. this makes things sort of tricky, and i'm very likely going to need to look into a pet friendly house, but i'm going to need other people to live with me, so if anyone needs a place or has a place to live please contact me.

missingiris @ 2007-09-17T10:56:00

2007-09-17T17:53:34Z

1. Go to http://www.careercruising.com/.
2. Put in Username: nycareers, Password: landmark.
3. Take their "Career Matchmaker" questions.
4. Post the top ten results.

1. Addictions Counselor

2. Humanitarian Aid Worker

3. Genetic Counselor

4. Taxidermist

5. Special Effects Technician

6. Gerontologist

7. Actor

8. Dental Assistant

9. Costume Designer

10. Set Designer

missingiris @ 2007-09-04T08:32:00

2007-09-04T14:47:39Z

It's my last day here. I meant to sleep in, since my alarm clock is already packed, but i woke up early. Its probably for the best, i still haven't finished packing my stuff, and i'd rather not pull an all nighter tonight. I'm spending some time with Nicole today, and Derek, and then that's all my goodbyes.

oh. my MP3 player was broken for months and it just started working again...this is convenient.

I'm ready to go. ish. and i'm nervous as hell. and sad. but i'm trying not to think about it too much.

missingiris @ 2007-09-03T19:07:00

2007-09-04T01:10:20Z

I need to be at the airport at around 3:45 to check in on Wednesday, I have to carry two pets and two suitcases. Does anyone want to come with me on the train to help me carry them? Or...does anyone want to drive me? Because that's a lot to carry.

missingiris @ 2007-09-02T17:48:00

2007-09-03T00:01:35Z

it hurts too much.